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Losing a lung cancer friend

While reading the newspaper on Friday evening, I was shocked to see an obituary for a State College friend who has lung cancer. The last I had heard from Nina Fosnacht was a Facebook post saying she was admitted to the hospital on April 1. She passed away 6 days later, just shy of her 61st birthday.

I met Nina because I joined a Facebook lung cancer support group, soon after I was diagnosed in Hamburg. I noticed that Nina and I had 3 mutual friends, so I sent her a message to inquire. Not only did she live in State College, but we also had the same primary care doctor (the fabulous Dr. Brian McCleary). Since I was in Germany at the time, I didn't have a US oncologist yet and wasn't sure who to pick, or even which lung cancer center I should go to (University of Pittsburgh Medical Center, various options in Philadelphia, New York, or DC). It was Nina who recommended that I see her oncologist, Dr. Villaruz, at UPMC, and I'm extremely grateful for that recommendation.

We met in person once, a couple months after we returned from Germany. I was still on oxygen 24/7 at that point, and quite fragile. Nina was so kind to bring me a vase of flowers and a card. As we sat on the back patio, Nina shared her cancer story: her original oncologist gave her only 6 months to live and told her she wouldn't see her younger daughter graduate from college. Nina did see her graduate, and lived 6 years after her diagnosis.

We kept in touch and shared encouragement and treatment updates through occasional Facebook messages. In addition to busy work schedules, one reason we didn't meet up again is that Nina frequently traveled with her family, exploring the world. It seemed like every time she posted on Facebook, she was on another cruise or trip--Santorini, the Caribbean, Puerto Rico, you name it. (I also discovered we had the same travel agent!) She went on a cruise as recently as late February. 

It seems cliche to say, but Nina made the most of her final years and months by doing what she loved and spending time with her husband, two adult daughters, and family pets. She often posted pictures of herself at her chemo appointment, attempting to "murder the Troll," the nickname she assigned her tumor. Many people in the lung cancer support group commented on how much they appreciated her positive attitude and "zest for life." 

Although we only met once, her death is hitting me hard because she was the only person with lung cancer that I knew "in real life," not just online. 

Comments

  1. NickyBApril 15, 2024 at 6:10 PM

    This hits hard, Esther. I'm so sorry for the profound loss. It's heartening to hear that she made the most of her life! Most of us can learn from her example.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. AnonymousApril 15, 2024 at 8:00 PM

      Your neighbor, Michelle here. I am so sorry for your loss of your friend, Nina. ❤️

      Delete
    2. Esther PrinsApril 18, 2024 at 11:24 AM

      Thank you, Nicky and Michelle.

      Delete
  2. IreneApril 18, 2024 at 2:11 AM

    Dear Esther, I'm sorry for the loss of this friend...so appreciate how you are honoring her in this way...and pointing out her zest for life. She sounds like someone who did "live deep and suck out all the marrow of life" as Thoreau wrote.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Esther PrinsApril 18, 2024 at 11:24 AM

      Thank you, Irene. She definitely did carpe diem.

      Delete

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